How to ditch your date

Imagine, you are out on a very lousy date. You regret after 10 mins into the date
You know your friends are out at a pub having some drinks while you chose this route.

How do you get out? How do you ditch your date?

- Tell her you think her sister is ‘damn Chio’.

- Scratch yourself a lot and when she asks, reply, “Dun worry. My doctor says it’s probably not contagious.”

- Step 1: Point suddenly behind your date and yell, “Look! It’s King Kong!” Step 2: Run away.

- Insist on going dutch. Then start arguing with her about how your portion of the bill should be less.

- Talk a lot about your ex.

- Rub your fingers in your armpits and smell them. If she gives you a look, offer your fingers to him to try.

- Propose.(this is high risk move!)

- Tell her you joined Young PAP or the Opposition.

- Keep telling her how the white the sheets are at Hotel 81.

- Tell her that you have excessive compulsive lying disorder and your are recovering from it. Telk her you are going to the Gents and don't come back.

- Tell her she's needs to lose weight, alot, Twice.

Top Ten Things Not to Say During Sex

By Popular Demand, here's my recital...

Top Ten Things not to say during sex

10. Can you please pass me the remote control?

9. Do you accept Visa?

8. And to think- I was really trying to pick up your friend!

7. Forza Italia!!!!!!!

6. I think you have it on backwards

5. You mean you're NOT my blind date?

4. When would you like to meet my parents?

3. My old girlfriend used to do it a LOT longer!

2. Hey, when is it going to be my friend's turn?

and....No.1 Thing Not to say during sex,


1. We still have a strong mandate

Sanity

Was reading the Newspapers, had a segment on sanity.
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some form of mental illness.

Imagine that.

Think of your three best friends.If they are okay, then it's you.

Let us all pray that our friends..at least one of them, is crazy.

Lets see, there's Judy..Mike....AH AH!